The Bible defines love in a pretty challenging way in 1 Corinthians 13. We like to take this quote and say it at weddings and put snippets of it up in our homes. If we stop to read it, these are some pretty hard words:
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
Think about what that really means. To love someone means that even when you're hurt, you are patient. You are kind. You are not envious (even of the fact that the other person may not be hurting). You are not proud (no wanting to prove you're right). Not rude (no silent treatment). You do not seek what is best for yourself. You don't get angry easily (even when there's frustration or you feel you're being mistreated). You keep no record of wrongs (meaning there's no 'how many times has this person done this to me?'). You don't delight in evil but rejoice with the truth (even when the truth hurts). You protect. Trust. Hope. Persevere. (Notice the little word ALWAYS before those words. As in each and every time. No matter what). You NEVER fail.
Dang. Any idea how hard that is? It's so much easier to "love" someone by saying "Hey. You hurt me. It's been nice having you in my life. Not so sure this is working out anymore. Hope you have a great life and if you ever need anything, you can let me know and I'll see if I feel like doing something nice for you, which I probably won't because I don't want to be hurt again."
The only way we are capable of having that incredible kind of love is because God loved us first and sent His Son as an example of His love (John 3:16).
"We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, 'I love God,' yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother." 1 John 4:19-21
Jesus' love for men was unbelievable. When He was on trial, being accused, mocked, beaten and sentenced to death, He said nothing. He didn't retaliate. He didn't defend Himself. He didn't lash out. He endured. Then, in His final words on the cross, He asked God to forgive those (us) who killed Him because we didn't know what were were doing (Luke 23:34).
If God could still love us after all our sin and send His Son to die for us... If Jesus could still ask God to forgive us despite all the persecution He endured... Surely, through His strength, I can stick by those who hurt me. It's an exciting challenge and a horribly painful experience all at the same time. It's love.
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